Another improvement.

Okay, don’t laugh at the over analysis – just for entertainment purposes only. Not to be used for the purposes of betting or sarcasm.

The off-road 10K that I have been doing (see efforts below) is actually about 6.06 miles, so 9.82 kms. In racing, it is typically one minute slower for runners around from 30:00 to 45:00 +/- a little on either end of the spectrum, because of the surface in comparison to their road 10K.

Now here is an equation that I find anecdotally to be quite good: “For every pound that you are over optimum weight, you lose two seconds per-mile per-pound.” So if you are for example 10 pounds over optimum race weight and race a 10K, you should be two minutes slower, all else being equal. Well I am 25-30 pounds heavier…..165 vs 135-137.

So let’s take six minutes off for being morbidly obese and one minute off plus a little (because I am slow – other end of the spectrum) and that is at least seven minutes of fasterness, than I currently am: 1:07:00 – 7:00 = 60:00 or 59:59’99 because as any runner knows, you see the clock-a-ticking towards a benchmark, you go a little faster…..

I used to run the route in 37:00-48:00 depending on the purpose of the run.

Surgery: Dec. 2, 2016

1:04 – Thurs, June 15 – 1 hour faster than Feb 26th, first time out.
1:06 – Tues, May 30.
1:07 – Thurs, May 25*
1:08 – Thurs, May 18. (note so self: lose 30 pounds).
1:09 – Thurs, May 4. May the 4th was with me.
1:13 – Sat, April 29 – Need to do more physio. These are the only effort outings I have done….
1:15 – Thurs, April 13 – Taking a week or two off this route as I am just chasing time…
1:16 – Sun, April 9 – ran about 11-12 minutes – 48:00 improvement in 42 days – 10 laps.
1:18 – Thurs, April 6 – ran about 10 minutes
1:22 – Fri, March 31 – ran about 6-7 minutes total – 33 days since first trip around lakes.
1:25 – Sun, March 27 – ran about 6-7 minutes total
1:29 – Wed, March 23 – ran about 5-6 minutes total
1:35 – Sun, March 19 – ran about 1 minute total
1:38 – Thurs, March 16 – no running
1:47 – Sun, March 12 – no running
1:57 – Sun, March 5 – no running
2:04- Sun, Feb. 26 – no running

*The asterisk is there because I had a massive brain fart and clicked “stop” on Garminder and then start 8 or 9 or 10 or 11 minutes later – who knows. So doing the math I started faster at 65:00 pace, for the first three K, then ended slower for the final 3K, based on my usual slow-down I suspect I would have come in at 67:00….

Some surgery site soreness, nearly 100% recovered next day…not quite.

Question for everyone who has run

Anyone have success with getting rid of the surgery stitches area/site scar tissue?

I find it quite thick and doesn’t move over the prosthetic that well, so after a 10K of walk/running, I have stinging very specific pain right at the scar that goes away shortly after I finish…..I also find that when I bend over girls whistle, so does the odd guy. Kidding, butt I find that I can feel the scar area slide over the prosthetic… a tight elastic.

Megadestroyer Imperial….

Megadestroyer Imperial Licorice Stout is one tasty beer. Howe Sound Brewery. That and Pothole Filler, that’s another Stout that’s tasty and less licoricey – also brewed by Howe Sound. Then there is Hermannator, the finest Double Ice Bock beer on the planet, earth’s heavenly nectar. Contains hints of caramel, molasses, nuts and coffee, with a slightly tart finish of walnut and an essence of good old wholesome yum. It sustains me.

I know someone who has the last known bottle to man (and woman too), I am going to take him hostage for his beer. They brew again for November, but we are moving towards the warm season: hops (IPA) and Heffeweissens. I cannot hold out that long, like Mizner, wouldn’t last the night in a bamboo cage (Vietnam War, Once a Runner reference).

Sorry. Lost track, what I was going to talk about was, remember when I posted and I was saying that my first hobble around Elk-Beaver Lakes (10K trail) was 2:04, then the following week 1:57, then the following week 1:47?

Well this week it was ….drum roll please….1:38, ta-da!

That’s 26-minute improvement. But, just to keep shit real, that’s an hour and one minute slower than my personal best on the course BA HA HA HA HA.

That’s why I am currently enjoying a Megadestroyer Imperial Licorice Stout.

Sunday, I go for a sub-1:30:00 and a hostage taking.

Deep in the rainforest; progress update.

Mark on your to do-list: Tofino, Vancouver Island, British Columbia, Canada Wickanninish Inn.

Just a 3.5 hour drive for us, but still stunning. Surf all year round if you have a 4/5mm wet suit.

Got in their gym today, this 101st day of post total hip replacement surgery.

20:00 stationary bike
15:00 eliptical
15:00 treadmonster (about 3:00 of running, shhhh don’t tell anyone)

Then a bunch of gym stuff.



The Professor and Mary-Anne, here on Gilligan’s Island.

We are afloat in a sea of ignorance, sailing on the S.S. Minnow and are about to land on a deserted island.

I would still pick Mary-Anne over Ginger.

I was talking to a professor yesterday. He was busy connecting a transistor radio to coconut shells and picking up some Japanese broadcast (he was driving and fading in and out of connectivity).

Anyway, he said that there is (we know this) no reliable data on wear rates of long-term running on artificial hips. There is some data on self-measured so-called “high impact” activity and there still is no significant wear rates that lead to revision from those activities. No causation/correlation.

Just anecdotal information.

Forget Gilligan, I feel like Magellan.

The professor is an assistant professor (Phd), who specialises specifically in post-joint replacement return to movement. The advice we are given is not based on scientific information.


Just a little data update

Three months and four days since surgery.

We have a lake route around here that we call “the lakes”….don’t ask….

It’s 10K and is quite flat, but is primarily a dirt surface and being in the rain forest, here, it is muddy, but there are gravelly parts too.

I used to run it in 39-48 minutes depending on purpose of run and race it in 37-38.

First walk around two weeks ago, with ski poles: 2:04:38. Last week: 1:57:37 yesterday: 1:47:28.

Who has money? Let’s wager I go for a 1:33:xx next week. Who’s in?


Got the green light, suckas. Timing is everything.

Me seven years ago, leading the Landsend half marathon. Ran the first 10K in a near personal best of 37:XX, then faded to 10th and finished in 1:23:58. Master age 42, I think….okay eight years ago. Maybe I was 43 or 44….who cares?

Timing is everything.

Got the green light to spin. My ultra-conservative surgeon gave me the green light to start spinning lightly. To go clipless, not stand up, but get on the bike, but don’t take to the roads just yet.

Tomorrow it will be three months: Dec 2 -> March 2.

He made references to running, but didn’t say, “one day run” – not sure if he was hinting or what – but if he is going to leave it up to me to interpret what he is saying, then as far as I am concerned, he explicitly said, “get out and run all you want,” which cannot be further from the truth.

“The process is a year,” he said.

Holy shit.

I have been playing table tennis and am now about 120-wins – 20-losses, with the cripplyness. The work opponents have been trying to take advantage of my inability to dive through the air.

They are going down.

Although they are getting better and better, like being chased in a dream, slow-mo through the mud, I will wake just in time to avoid being eaten by the cannibals. Or being beaten by a crappy table tennis player.

Anyway, I will spin tomorrow. Playoffs are coming up. Spring is in the air. Timing couldn’t be better….not to mention we have a work-party table tennis tournament coming up this week.

They are going down.

Timing is everything.

All important 78-day follow-up and check-in and report and update and blog entry and status report and whereabouts prominence

Yesterday, so I guess really “77-day report,” I walked a 10K trail loop with ski poles. Note, not “walking poles”, but downhill ski poles, just because.

I probably walked about 15K yesterday including a 1.5K walk from car park to race start area (photo shooting) and then back again, plus the 10K, plus random other movement while I was out and about, for example grocery shopping, which is good because the shopping cart is like having poles – gives stability in the effort to walk perfectly straight. And if I was dyslexic, they would be “sik lopes” – a dyslexic Fruedian misnomer.

In this case, we put the cart before the horse, metaphorically and malapropism-ally.

Anyway, the coordination to take advantage of the poles required no time whatsoever. I plan to drop those bad boys soon, so have no intention of buying nordic-walking poles.

So no problems whatsoever from the extreee walking.  I find this interesting as the most I have walked since my surgery date on December 2nd, was about 3K in one go. So to jump ahead to 10K and 15K for the day is exciting, especially with having no repercussions.

Well there were repercussions, but I solved that issue with a mouth-watering bottle of Earth’s Heavenly nectar, a double bock (ice-bock stout that you have at room temperature) known as Hermannator; it’s the elixer of life. A seasonal fare that provides a note of caramel and dates and a hint of a nuts and molasses finish; perfectly paired with a juicy steak well seasoned and cooked just so on the barbie.

We had nachos, but added beef. Hermannator pairs with anything actually. Even hot buttered popcorn.

Have played table tennis (don’t call it Ping Pong (®) ) for about a month. Record at work is currently about 100-15 and that’s with my opponents taking advantage of my inability to dive through the air, due to THR.

I can see doing short ultras in my future. I couldn’t really before. But rather than do road marathons, I can see doing trail 50K races (30 mile). So I might go for that.

I love racing 800-metres, but the nuero-muscular function has to be so high, where in an ultra, the running is pretty low-profile.

…just thinking out loud. Feel free to unknow most of the latter bits.






Hello Prosthetic my old friend, I’ve come to walk with you again

Well here is my sweet junk on display. This was a candid shot. We considered posing to the left and posing to the right and doing something different with my hair, but I think this one captures my personality well. You can really tell that I am half Irish here; County Cork.

I am guessing the shiny bit is so when I run at night, traffic will see me from a distance. Better than those safety vests, I will tell you that.

Slick as ice.

The other side looks like it wasn’t afflicted with osteoarthritis. Sad really, looks kinda dull.

Doc was adamant that I cannot run after surgery, today he was talking about when I run again….real paradigm shift there. I left the office with my jaw dragging on the floor.

Doc said, “keep using two crutches, don’t use a cane”. As when we walk with a cane, we walk askew. Two crutches we are aligned straight. Makes sense.

Surgery: Dec 2nd. Eighteen days later (today), pulled staples. Can shower now.

’tis a good day.

“The words of the prosthetics are written on the subway walls…”